The Trot Blog


Funny Caption Contest
April 9, 2009, 8:59 am
Filed under: Comedy | Tags: , , ,

horse head

 

We found a pretty funny caption contestTry and come up with a caption for the horse head dude in the picture above.

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Blonde Riding a Horse
March 27, 2009, 2:22 pm
Filed under: Comedy | Tags: , ,

blonde_cowgirl

Blonde Riding a Horse

A blonde decides to learn and try horse back riding assisted without any experience or lessons.

She mounts the horse with great effort, and the tall, shiny horse springs into motion.

It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle.

Out of shear terror, she grabs for the horse’s mane but cannot seem to get a firm grip.

She tries to throw her arms around the horse’s neck, but slides down the side of the horse anyway.

The horse gallops along, seemingly oblivious to its slipping rider.

Finally, giving up her frail grip, she leaps away from the horse to try and throw herself to safety.

Unfortunately, her foot has become entangled in the stirrup.

She is now at the mercy of the horse’s pounding hooves as her head is struck against the ground again and again.

As her head is battered against the ground, she is moments away from unconsciousness or even death when Todd, the Wal-Mart Manager, runs out to turn the horse off.

(source unknown)



HAMBLETONIAN® STAKE NO. 84

hambo_logo

 

The Hambletonian Society has released their list of eligibles for The Hambletonian

Gotta be in it to win it!

Lloyd: What are the chances of a guy like you and a girl like me… ending up together?
Mary: Well, that’s pretty difficult to say.
Lloyd: Hit me with it! I’ve come a long way to see you, Mary. The least you can do is level with me. What are my chances?
Mary: Not good.
Lloyd: You mean, not good like one out of a hundred?
Mary: I’d say more like one out of a million.
[pause]
Lloyd: So you’re telling me there’s a chance.

dumb_and_dumber

Best of luck to all.  1 in 154 chance today anyways to race for $1.7 million is good enough for most of us.



J O K E
March 11, 2009, 8:55 am
Filed under: Comedy | Tags: , , ,

{We aren’t sure who to credit or blame this joke on, but we thought it was funny}

raffle

 

 

 

 

 

Dead Horse

Young Chuck in Montana bought a horse from a farmer for $100. The farmer
agreed to deliver the horse the next day.

The next day the farmer drove up and said, “Sorry son, but I have some
bad news… the horse died.”

Chuck replied, “Well, then just give me my money back.”

The farmer said, “Can’t do that. I went and spent it already.”

Chuck said, “Ok, then, just bring me the dead horse.”
The farmer said, “What are you going to do with a dead horse?”

Chuck said, “I’m going to raffle him off.”

The farmer said, “You can’t raffle off a dead horse!”

Chuck said, “Sure I can, watch me. I just won’t tell anybody he’s dead.”

A month later, the farmer met up with Chuck and asked, “What happened
with that dead horse?”

Chuck said, “I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at two dollars a
piece and made a profit of $998.”

The farmer said, “Didn’t anyone complain?”

Chuck said, “Just the guy who won. So I gave him his two dollars back.”

Chuck grew up and now works for the government. He’s the one who figured
out how this “bail-out” is going to work.



Vote for your favorite nickname for Tim Tetrick:

 Tim Tetrick shatters records for harness racing drivers

Tim Tetrick



Whatever you do, do not give your horse Fiber One Bars
February 12, 2009, 4:22 pm
Filed under: Comedy | Tags: , , , , ,

fiberonegranolabarsRead every comment without laughing – bet ya can’t!!!!!  

Whatever you do, do not give these Fiber One Bars make me Fart bars to your horse or look out!



A Cherished Preakness Tradition Is No More

There are so many angles to take on this fine subject.  On one hand, A Cherished Preakness Tradition Is No MorePreakness Partier Takes Nappy Poo.  On the other hand, they replace bringing your own coolers with making you listen to arguably the worst band on the planet, Buckcherry? Not a fair trade my friend, not fair at all.

  My guess is that the beer thing is a good idea.  $3.50 per beer is reasonable and we might avoid the idiot who jumps the fence and tries to punch a horse, yes, it happened before. 

The good news is this news has come out in plenty of time, so they can put earplugs into the horses’ ears.  If they are humane to the horses, they’ll plan to have Buckcherry playing inside the first turn so the poor horses can keep the earplugs in! 

ZZ Top is OK I suppose.  They will sound like Led Zeppelin compared to Buckcherry. 

As for the racing event itself, maybe the $3.50 can get some improvements done to Pimlico.  Pimlico is in dire need of an upgrade, as are all the other struggling MD horse tracks.  Maybe the slots will help in the near future.  In the meantime, Baltimorians, start saving your beer $ for the big race!